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| Pt.1 "Untitled" |
Everything that I see reminds me of Trent
Reznor. When I hear the word, "dog," it , of course,
pulls me into Trent's world, and I remember "Downward
Spiral" whenever I see a spiral. When I go to bed, I
wonder howTrent feels about me. Since I think about him 24
hours a day, he appears in my dreams, too. This is not a lie
or an over exaggeration.
Last time, I wrote "I will fight for Trent!!",
but when I woke up, I realized it is not right for me to say
that. I will not try to figure out who is the winner or who
is loser in the world of Trent. This is really nonsense! I rather
stay in myself and send him all of my love more than the amount
he can handle. In other words, my love will flow like water
from my heart. When he is feeling negative, I will give him
positive love. I am extremely happy and joyful every time I
think of him. He changed my life in this age. I'd say totally
positively!! I love you, Trent!!
For me, Trent is not just an object of love.
He is the most important aspect in my life. Maybe, I just wanna
show him to everybody, and say, "Hey, I know this extremely
valuable and precious guy!!" He is so adorable to me. Yes!!
He is "a warm place" for me!! >>
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Although the place was dirty and dark in the
past, it is a peaceful and warm sunny place, now. The past is
the past. It's all gone. The present is the present. You know?
I can say that I love the place no matter if it is dark and
dirty or sunny and warm. I would be able to love it both ways.
Someone said that my love for Trent is a maternal
love that accepts everything about him. Maybe so. . . Yes!!
It is so!! Therefore, I decided to pour out my love to him as
if it is water!! Mothers never regret or save their love for
their beloved children. Mothers never expect rewards from their
beloved children. I will not be pushed away or put down by anybody
because I have my own style and will!! If someone says this
love for Trent is not suitable, who cares!! Try and make me
give up loving him!! It's not as easy as you think!
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| Pt.2
"Poppy Album" |
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"Poppy Album...by Chris" means "Pretty Hate Machine."
Do you know that its cover picture was originally just an engine?
Speaking about it, Trent likes to compare humans to machines,
doesn't he? Also, the cover represents rib bones. Is it from the
bible story about Adam and Eve? Does it mean the original sin?
If so, what a deep meaning this cover has!!
If whatever I said is what me meant, maybe he
means that he can accept "Pretty Hate" human beings,
including their original sin. Or maybe he is talking about a
female. Don't you think so, because there are many love songs
in this album?!? "Ringfinger" is really touching,
the words can make me cry. And "Sanctified" has such
a deep meaning! There is the same kind of feeling in the song
"Closer." I guess Trent might have been deeply in
love with someone at this time.
Well, how can I say...? Don't you think that
Trent has his own beliefs about his work? He will not follow
any fad. He said, "I just compose whatever ideas I have
into my music." I believe he is right. He promised to himself
when he formed Nine Inch Nails that, "if I got married
next week and became so happy (This probably means if he got
changed radically), I would either quit music or change my music
to a totally different style."
As evidence of what he said, his album "Halo"
is coordinated under the same direction (Part 1 and 3 of the
U.S. version are a little bit different from others). He only
thinks about human beings on those albums. This shows that he
has a strong philosophy and lives without changing himself.
>>
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So much effort and courage is needed to live
without compromising oneself, and Trent is doing it right now.
This is another reason why I really respect him!! He is so great!
He lives life to the fullest!
I wanna ask him if he knows how important he
is. He might answer "yes," or "sure." There's
no doubt that his body and mind are important to this world.
I have never seen any musician who takes care of himself as
much as Trent does. He said he goes to church every Sunday.
He takes his life seriously because life is so precious to him.
Oh my god! He is so awesome.
I usually think these thoughts all day long...Every
time I see a video or picture I use all my brain to understand
what he means. Maybe this makes me a bit smarter recently.
Somehow, I am sort of a great detective about
Trent. I really like thinking about him. One day, I kept thinking
about him and analyzing him in my way. I found out from another
source later that my analysis was totally true. This is why
I got so into him, I think. I love to put together tiny pieces
of the puzzle to understand Trent.
Anyway, I really can't wait until "New
Halo" comes out. I will find the answer to another mystery
like I always do! Trent, I'm ready all the time! I'll be waiting
for you! The most difficult mystery must be you, but I will
solve that no matter what.
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| Pt.3 "I'll
Be There" |
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Trent, do you know that every time I read your interviews my
eyes water because you are so precious? You encourage me and
guide me.
Once you said, "If I could help other people...".
That's not impossible or difficult to do. Of course you are
helping people! I am someone you helped! If you need proof,
I will prove it to you anytime. After I knew you, my life turned
into one full of happiness and joy like words can never express.
I can absolutely say that you gave me positive energy. I'm very
happy you are "there." I'm glad I noticed you "there"
before you left.
Ohhh...there is no man better than him! I can keep talking
about him and giving him compliments forever. The more and more
I know about him, the deeper and deeper I'm interested in him.
I had no idea there was a man like him on this earth. Thank
God I found out about him!! I will protect him as much as I
can. Nobody can take Reznor away from my heart. I promise that
I will believe in him no matter if I'm the only person in this
world. I believe in Trent Reznor. >>
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I know there are many people who cannot understand what I wrote,
but I don't blame those people. Because it took a lot of time
for me to reach this point. It's not worth it if I force others
to see Trent, force others to understand him. Anyone can understand
him if they really want to. I did. Trent, you leave your footprints
for us to understand you.
I will walk in the desert to find you, even if you appear as
a mirage. I believe I can reach an oasis YOU. I want to understand
you. I want to hold you. Rez, I always believe in you.
I WILL BE THERE, Trent.
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